Birthday weekend in Durbs

My birthday weekend actually didn't really pan out the way I had planned it to be. Busy as always, a part of me dragged the entire trip of having to be in Durban by myself lonely self. But I kept telling myself the entire morning 'not to feel this heartbreak' And guess what? I had a pretty relaxed time Ethekwini once again. Booked into a hotel in North Beach, I spent the five days willingly laying inside the white sheets of my hotel room bed and ordering room service for all the meals of the day. This was totally unexpected, I kid you not. I went out to a few unusual Pubs around the north beach area, walking distance from Blue Suites Hotel.  I got to meet new friends, eat the 'famous' mutton curry bunny chow and enjoyed a night out at the infamous Cubanna in Florida.

 On my way back home I was happy to see the only girl that could ever, try, turn a guy like me straight (in South Africa) - miss Boity Thulo. As we were walking out of the aircraft and walking into the doors of Lanseria Airport. I felt emped up with love and confidence from being around my own space and genuinely feeling happy about that. Having nobody there to join me on my birthday dinner now felt really positive. 

As a twenty seven year old recoving drug addict, I sometimes feel pressure to sustain a concrete identity of who I really am to people in society. I call it living a suffering lavish lifestyle and ultimately, I'm all about my happiness and having a good time right now in my life. Walking my journey is what's most important. Ya'll should always know how much I pride myself about my culture and my ethnic group.

Ngilindebele mina. I am destined for greatness, ekhaya akuhlala!

Someone who is inspired by the weather

The weather this past week in Johannesburg has been pretty bipolar. Fluctuating and changing each and every day- one night its raining, another day its windy, then another day the sun comes out so on. Im really not enjoying this sudden gloomy winter weather- more especially in summer, we shouldnt be experiencing rain and such terrible cloudy and grey days during the day. Or should we? I feel completely uninspired in this state of weather because all I tend to think about is staying indoors and making sure Im comfortable and warm. So when I do go out I just throw on a combination of strange things like boots, a pair of jeans and a leather jacket. I always tend to think about keeping warm more than I think about looking good. Fact is, any day when I'm not having to cover up is a great day for me to look good - so I can also feel good. That's just me! 

I honestly want to start feeling my mood once again bright, inspired and chipper by the simple radiant light of sunshine. That's my leeway to making people understand how simple I am in the way in which I dress and carry myself . I want my readers to know everything about my style evolution and how grown and funky its become, more especially being known as the 'ordinary' guy who appears to look dapper in clothes which are considered affordable by most people.

Living in a new age. In my own way.

I just got back from my birthday weekend in Durban and let me say I have in depth mixed emotions about how realisticly legalistic zulu people are. That topic thou,  will be a blog on its  own - together with my entire experience of ethekwini, north beach and of cause turning a year old. I'm only a few months since I've moved out of home and my mind has been actively spinning with thoughts of the life I lived under the influence of so many mood and mind altering substances. It’s hard having to be back to the exact same community that nearly killed me, literally. But let me tell you, Facing your “demons” is something we all have to do at some point. We must confront the things that plague us– our insecurities, shortcomings, and the sneaking suspicion that maybe we are not as good of people as we play ourselves to be. I just knew it would be best for me to leave home in order to face all my demons - head on, with the help and support of the people who love me the most. Family. If I were to somehow measure my well-being and the general state in which my life was in at the time, it would've been without a doubt been equivalent to zero or even close to absolutely nothing. I know for a fact I can't go back to doing the same things I did in the past. So I've put together a relapse prevention to help me stay fully focused on pursuing a much more meaningful existence.

This is a list of things that will possibly help me along my path.

·       Using positive affirmations

·       Staying active and focused

·       Not go into tough situations by myself

·       Start each day and end each day with a session at the gym OR any other recovery orientated activity I might have in mind

·       Talk to others about my recovery as much as I can

·       Prepare for the most challenging situations if I can’t avoid it